If you find out your mate is cheating, NEVER take it up with the person they are cheating with, otherwise, you look just as stupid as your cheating mate, not to mention, your showing this other person how much power they have over you.
Never show your enemies your weakness. That's like Obama giving terrorists a road map on how to get into the White House and directly into the oval office. I know that sounds a lot easier said than done but no matter what you do, don't react to them. Once your enemies know what bothers you, they WILL push your buttons just for sport.
Even if the other person was throwing it at your mate, it's up to your mate to say no to them and it's up to them to be loyal and faithful to you. Your mate is the one who made promises, said they love you, it's you and me against the world, we're going to be together forever, I'm going to be with you only and no one else, blah blah blah blah blah. The other person owes you nothing, nada, zilch, ZERO because some of the time, they don't even know who you are and in SOME cases, your mate didn't even claim you.
I know that sounds harsh and immoral, but it's a harsh world and if you wait on others to be moral when it comes to your relationship, you have a better chance at winning lotto. Your issues are solely with your mate because if you pluck the person they cheated with out of the equation, they would've just replaced them with someone else because they were going to cheat on you anyway.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not condoning people going after other's mates, all I'm simply saying is you can't control the actions of what other's do and when you let go of the frustration of trying to control it, you will feel a lot freer and less disappointed if this happens.
There are different levels of cheating and different reasons why people cheat and that's a topic for another day, but for now, let's just say everything happens for a reason and sometimes them cheating is a wake up call that you either aren't as great of a mate as you thought you were which is why they turned to someone else OR they really were just a worthless piece of shit and you are better off without them.
If they turned to someone else because you sucked at being a good mate, yes they should've left you first instead of cheating, blah blah blah, but again, you can't control what other's do, why, or how, so instead of spending your energy being mad at them for handling it so poorly, perhaps you should look deeper into why they thought you sucked. If people have a pattern of leaving you, this is something you really should look deeper into. Maybe you're possessive, smothering, overly jealous, boring, or just flat out a pain in the ass.
Bottomline, even though your mate was wrong for cheating, you are solely responsible for how you respond to it. Part of being a mature adult is learning how not to react to everyone and anything that offends you. It's learning how to think things through before you respond, that's if you choose to respond. Sometimes you say a lot more when you say less or when you say nothing at all. There is power in ignoring.
Thoughts? Please share them below.........